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WHAT DOESN’T KILL YOU MAKES YOU STRONGER

Butterfly-TransformationSince 2010 when this site was introduced, we have all gone through many struggles, hardships and joys with one another.  This is a story many have seen before but I think it needs to be written once more as a reminder. It is the butterfly saga.

A man found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening appeared. He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole. Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could and it could go no further. So the man decided to help the butterfly.

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He took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon. The butterfly then emerged easily. But it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings. The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time. Neither happened!  In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings. It never was able to fly.

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What the man, in his kindness and haste, did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were GOD’S way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.
Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our lives. If GOD allowed us to go through our lives without any obstacles, it would cripple us. We would not be as strong as what we could have been.

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WE WOULD NEVER FLY!

And be not configuring yourselves unto this age, But be transforming yourselves by the renewing of your mind, To the end ye may be proving what is the thing willed by GOD- the good and acceptable and perfect.” (Romans 12:2, Rotherham, the Emphasized Bible)

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As you go through life, keep in mind that struggling is an important part of any growth experience. In fact, it is the struggle that causes you to develop your ability to fly.
A lot of the struggles experienced by those leaving the witnesses has been loss of family associations. I have in my case noticed it only lasted for about 5 years.  Slowly it has released others in the family to take a hard look at the situation and realize a person must be free to choose a personal relationship with God and not because their parents chose a religion.

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There are many facebook pages with support groups for those that don’t have friends. This website and others provide spiritual food for some of the pages.  There are support forums that allow you to shout out verbally your hurt and experiences, as this is a major part of healing; to have a listening ear. To be able to speak without judgement or punishment from a group of misguided men. Such forums allows you to flex your wings as you emerge from the constrictions of the cocoon. This same constriction however made you a beautiful sight to behold!

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Those emerging have been blessed by GOD and can choose to help others and continue to heal themselves and their family.
The main thing I have found is to wait, Be patient, Don’t push.  Most people would rather SEE a sermon than hear one.

 

But in your hearts set Christ apart as holy as LORD. Always be ready to give a logical defense to anyone who asks you to account for the hope that is in you. but do it courteously and respectfully“. 1Peter 3:15 (Amplified Bible)

 

How has your life and circumstances changed since getting free. Perhaps you can add something that will help someone else just coming out. We would love to hear from you now, especially if you were here years ago. Thank you

25 comments to WHAT DOESN’T KILL YOU MAKES YOU STRONGER

  • Danny

    An old elder told my Dad once that what don’t kill you hurts like h!!! Sometimes a little laugh helps when hurting. I have to admit that the pain of leaving so many behind has made me stronger, but it’s left many scars also. I’ve learned to lean on Jesus, have had periods where I do my own thing, as I please. But I get back up. I’ve been down for a bit now and feel to weak to pull myself back up. Please pray for me? God bless you.

    • Jacqueline (Bible student)

      Danny I will pray for you. Before I saw this I was talking to Jesus about my lose of family. But think if they didn’t shun you and others, they would suck you back in. You would never get free. Life can be like a roller coaster sometimes up, down, scary at times but thrills in between. But at the end of the ride you feel better for having gone on that ride. It is called living. You need Jesus as you surmise but you also need support and friends. There are brothers that have come out that are asking who needs help. Would you like me to tell him to come on and talk to you? Ask questions here, jump in on conversations. There are a bunch of brothers on here waiting to help you.
      Your journey has brought you this far, trying to introduce the organization ba’m into your life can derail you. Make a clean break and God will send the Helper, his Holy Spirit. That religion Carrie too much pain and control with it to be from God. Christ sets you free and he adds no pain with it.
      Tell us more about how you got to this point or ask questions or add some thoughts for us to ponder.
      We will pray for you. You have come to the right place, we are all just like you finding out about Christ in a whole new way. Jacqueline

    • Jacqueline (Bible Student)

      Danny I just noticed you have made a giant step. You are the person that I was talking to from the contact form. You and I know your email address is unforgettable. LOL
      Would you be available to call in tomorrow on our study? Here is the link:http://www.friendsofjehovahswitnesses.com/2016/04/19/feb-6-wed-new-study-join-us-the-time-is-at-hand-volume-2-of-studies-in-the-scriptures/
      Also if you can stay on afterward there are brothers that can talk to you and exchange info. If your name doesn’t show let us know you are on and I will write Danny there so Br. Brad knows it is you. We can help and the brother that wants to be of assistance will be on there. Take Care of yourself.

  • Well I haven’t seen you lately Jacqueline, And please don’t tell me that you are not on fb. Like you so obviously did tell Christopher to tell me. Hmm? You must have forgotten all our chats and so on, on fb. No worries, I know you were on everyday and even more. But it is not valuable to have hatred for the brethren. Which I guess you may just have for some. Hmm? how will that do for you in the future? You have those you call geeks and put you in some kind of overview of not conversing with me, which is not love. You may need to check yourself on that one.

    How or what have I done on your behalf to make you do this to me. I really only wanted to tell of my feelings. But really don’t want to be around those that put me down or may not like my association.

    It is very cool with me. bc, I actually cannot find a reason for you to feel as you do. But I will continue to be strong. And do as I do. See I tell it as it is and maybe that makes me unlikable, But I sure do remember you too, saying that you say what is also on your mind.

    • Jacqueline (Bible Student)

      Rowena hello, I am not really sure who you are, the last name isn’t familiar. I can’t comment on what you are saying because I don’t understand what you are saying. Are you in the Michigan area? I am going to proceed as if you are. Yes I do go on facebook but I post sayings mostly or deal with my family and will post or read the sixscreens posts. I am not a big poster to any individual on facebook but my family and normally I call them. I don’t care for the private messenger on facebook and will often block or ignore it because I don’t have time to talk individually with most.
      Please discuss here what the problem seems to be. This is the best way to reach me. I notice you mention Christopher saying I was not on facebook. I will at time close my account for activity, and I have done that in the past year to get some work done. Whether this is what you are speaking of I don’t know but I can speak for myself and as I stated this is the best way to contact me.
      If you are the Rowena from Michigan, I have no problem with you. I am in the Chicago class and also an Indiana online class. I really have not visited the Michigan conventions this year since General so You would not have seen me lately. You mention “it is not valuable to have hatred for the brethren”. I don’t have hatred for the brethren and I don’t have this for some. Whom exactly are you referring too? And could you have that person call me Please.
      I think you feel I know you well but I have met you only once at the General convention and had some conversations with you on facebook before then. I don’t really know you and neither do you really know me. Perhaps you feel differently on our relationship.
      Hope you are doing well and please be direct when you say there is a problem and I will try to address it. Thank you Jacqueline

  • Jacqueline (Bible Student)

    My dear Br. Tazzyman , we got your update on your life now after the death of your wife in a car accident.
    But WOW, if you could tell us what your life is like now or allow us to publish your good news and happy life now from contact form.
    At any rate we will pass it on David Stein and others at your request. Godspeed!

  • Daz

    Thought this article was interesting:

    Jehovah’s Witnesses deny rumours UK headquarters move to Chelmsford could collapse

    By PeteWalkerAdv | Posted: October 01, 2015

    JEHOVAH’S Witnesses have quashed rumours that the bid to bring their headquarters to Chelmsford could collapse due to financial turmoil.

    The International Bible Students’ Association (IBSA), the organisation which circulates the Christian group’s literature, said on Monday that the construction in Temple Farm in West Hanningfield will continue.

    An anonymous source contacted the Chronicle on Friday claiming a woman in the IBSA’s construction department confirmed the project would terminate.

    The man, a current Jehovah’s Witness member, said: “Something major is going on with the organisation financially.”

    RELATED CONTENT
    Jehovah’s Witnesses get crucial planning go-ahead for UK headquarters in Chelmsford
    1,200 Jehovah’s Witnesses set for Chelmsford move as UK HQ plans submitted
    Jehovah’s Witnesses put pen to paper on Temple Farm move.
    The IBSA did however confirm it was pulling the plug on other construction projects worldwide.

    Stephen Morris, IBSA’s personnel support manager at its branch relocation department, said: “In order to make best use of contributed funds, some construction projects worldwide will be delayed or cancelled.

    “However, we are pleased to confirm that the Temple Farm project will continue. We still have a very active

    workforce on site, and we have no intention or directive to close down or sell the site at Temple Farm.”

    Mr Morris added that all the old buildings, which included car breakers garages, have been demolished at the 50-acre site off Stock Road.

    He added that workers are preparing for utility firms to enter the site to get readypave the way for building work.

    The Chronicle exclusively revealed in January 2014 how the IBSA is relocating the headquarters from Mill Hill in north London and build a printing plant producing up to 184,000 religious magazines an hour, accommodation for up to 1,200 Witnesses, parking for 1,040 vehicles and a hospital and playing fields.

    Read more: http://www.essexchronicle.co.uk/Jehovah-s-Witnesses-deny-rumours-UK-headquarters/story-27899763-detail/story.html#ixzz3nLhnakyc
    Follow us: @Essex_Chronicle on Twitter | essexchronicle on Facebook

    • Jacqueline (Bible Student)

      Daz, the watchtower lawyers demanded jwsurvey.com take down the letter saying it was copywrite. So it is confirmed that the letter posted about all this was true. They should have ignored the postings but instead validated by contacting the provider and filing a claim against jwsurvey.com.

  • Dundee (Bible Student)

    Hi everyone! It has been about 2 years now, come to think of it since my walking out the door of the kingdom hall. Since then….my father still over analyzes my expressions, now which is via text messages. He refuses to speak to me or his grandkids. My mom also joined the Bible Students along with me. We had been very active in the jw community for 40years. Each time that i cross paths with my jw brothers, i sense a lack of LOVE. I visit some after working in their area. I tell them I love them & give a hug when leaving, they smile but cannot say those words back. My jw father will not say it. I have received old letters back that I wrote to some years ago when i was younger, red pen marked up like a teacher correcting sentence structure, but I was writing to her husband, a beautiful elder that is now dead. She felt after he died to send me back a corrected letter. odd. Two JW elders recently joined with my x wife & attempted to sway a judge to take my children away from me. Attempts failed but it cost me about $4000 U.S.dollars.They continue to taunt me though I do not belong in their kingdom hall. My son has been called feminine by an elder, (but he has no femininity). Elders tell him he MUST start turning in his field service time, which he doesn’t, he is almost 15. That he must give talks & get baptized or else God WILL destroy him. Sisters come to him & make fun of him every single meeting giving him a complex. My daughter is compared to other children younger than her who are doing those things but she chooses not to like her brother. Their maternal grandmother says my son will be destroyed by God. My x wife tells me I will be judged at Armageddon. My x wife is trying, with the help of jw elders, to violate my 1st ammendment rights by taking the children away from my religion & they must go to the kingdom hall with her only. I told the court mediator I will fight for my legal rights, the 1st ammendment of the constitution protects me here. So I await the court to schedule trial. jw elders have provided legal precedents to take my kids away. But Jehovah & Jesus protected me. Two elders continue to be a source of persecution continually. No one in the jw community knows I am a Bible Student. I love the B.S.Conventions.The meetings where i go are a little tough for me. I do attend, but not everyone.I am a single father trying to teach them the way. I am continually trying to learn. I have never been more happy than now breaking free of the mind control, & the abuse of many of the elders.I do miss the genuine elders that have passed away. But if they were still around, I would not of broken away so easily.

    • Jacqueline (Bible Student)

      Dundee my you are being financially and emotionally hit. Having children that go to the kingdom hall makes your situation tougher. It would be nice if the children could just go to one religion until they become adults and can make their own decisions. I feel so sorry for them in the middle. But children are thinkers now a days and watchers.
      The sister that sent you the letters is just immature and you can’t really grow a person up. Lola
      BULLYING should not be tolerated by the children within the kingdom hall. The elder might be grooming your son, so this is something that can’t be brushed aside easily either. There are lots of pedophiles in the kingdom halls and they will take advantage of a young one in a divided home to groom for predatory purposes.
      I don’t really have much contact with witnesses and if I did I wouldn’t talk about spiritual matters unless asked because it is like pitching pearls or jewels before swine. They don’t know what to do with it. All my acquaintances and family are aware I am truly gone and worship with the Bible Students. It throws them for a loop, they get confused and it makes it difficult for them to feel their way is superior. If they say I worship wrongly. I ask for an example, keep them on the defense. Always answer their question with a question.
      Play ping ping, knock the ball back into their court. Witnesses are not good with scriptures so stay that course.
      I make these suggestions because you have contact it seems with them. I was a loner for the 62 years I was there. You developed some good friendships and I know you miss them. It is like mourning. It is times like these that I immerse myself in prsyet with tears. Please take care of yourself, court is a lot to go thru. Hopefully the government will put the religion out of the equation and make a decision on what is strictly in the interest of the children not the religion or parents. But you are stressed and I will and have prayed for you to resolve and be able to live your life with your children and mo . Godspeed

      • shannon

        my dear brothers and sisters many things have felt worse then death for the pain I feel being a ex jw is deep if it were not for you my life would be hard all my family except one brother don’t talk to me there is no love in jws but im past that I am getting stronger every day

        • Jacqueline (Bible Student)

          Hi Shannon, so glad you are hanging in there. We enjoy your comments on the studies on Wednesday. Hope to talk to you tomorrow. Take Care my brother and God Bless.

        • Bret (Bible Student)

          Shannon;
          Hang in there!! Start to check out some of the articles writen and posted here on Friends of JW.. I suggest articles and recordings on the “Ransom for All”.
          I spent over 20 years slaving for the “Organization” just to learn you don’t matter to them. Served as Elder and Servant 18 of those years and cannot compare 1 minute of it in comparison to knowing the truth now that the organization left behind. Liberty in Christ is good and being free from the judgmental attitude you develop there is good.

  • My dear brethren. Soon will be the two years since I left the third Babylon. I was so busy all that time. Jehovah imediatly ocupied me with His good work. It was as he said: My son I have a work for you to do.” I am so happy in the Lord and rejoice in His glorious service. He blessed me with little ecclesia and with many interested persons. my knowgledge about Him and His Divine plan of the Ages increased tremendously. What that I say: THANK YOU JEHOVAH AND JESUS MY ELDER BROTHER AND KING OF GLORY”

    • Christopher

      I thought you left way over 2 years ago.

      • Jacqueline (Bible Student)

        Christopher, who are you addressing? If me I left in Sept. 2009 physically and did hook up until December of 2009. I saw the Bible student convention on Dawn website after talking to 1800-GodsPlan. We got cut off by a snowstorm and I didn’t know what number I called. No cellphone at that time in my area so was on a landline but I remembered the sister mentioned the different associations of brothers and Dawn stuck. I went to the New Year’s convention in 2010 and the rest is history. Now if you were addressing someone else (LOL) tell me the name and I will insert it. Take Care.

        Stupid me Christopher now I see who you are addressing. Well I will just leave this here anyway. LOL

  • Humbleman

    Thank you very much for the article, Br. Peter & Sr Jaqueline. It’s just what u needed 🙂

    • Jacqueline (Bible Student)

      Hello Humbleman, we haven’t heard that name in a long time but I know you are doing okay. We are getting comments on facebook about this article, hopefully some more will tell us where they are now in their walk since leaving the organization. Take Care and tell your family hello.

      • Sonya

        I’ve always felt like a butterfly? Breaking free from the norm and doing my own and doing what I felt was right.. It can be scary out there as a lone butterfly not knowing for sure if what you’re doing is right, but knowing for sure what you left behind was definitely supposed to be left behind.. Thank you Aunt Jackie that was a perfect analogy

        • Jacqueline (Bible Student)

          You are welcome. Most on here are not aware that our family has connected on the facebook pages and this weekend has been enlightening for us to see that there are more witnesses in our family than we knew about.
          I am one of the oldest Aunts that knows everybody and the connections in the family. So I consented to get all of the younger generation together. I hope they enjoy each other and can meetup. Most of them are witnesses and so the page has become about that. Which is okay with me but I was getting physically ill, seeing kingdom hall and convention pictures.
          I became aware I was not as healed as I thought I was. So I have said good-bye to the family page, I love the guys on there but I was relapsing.
          All of them understood since I am one of the oldest on there that I have no need to meet everyone. I have kept in touch with every member in the family witnesses or not. I will always give them names of relatives.
          I must however get off the page for my health.
          Thank you so much for coming here and saying hello.
          If you would like ever to tell us your story or experiences we would love to hear it. But don’t feel compelled to do so, if it takes you back to a dark place. Here we share to help each other.
          Love you so much and take Care.

  • Daz

    Very good post Peter, a fine example regarding the butterfly!
    I hope yo are keeping well.

    Kindest regards,
    Daz

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